Thursday, September 23, 2010
Kicks Lesson #1 - Cultural Experience
As Ramadan came to a close earlier this month, I partook in an experience with a friend that I will never forget. I joined an old high-school buddy, Shuaib, in a “sawn”, the tradition of fasting during daylight hours during Ramadan, and despite all prior expectations I found the lesson that I learned was less a religious occurrence than it was a cultural one. It was like stepping into another culture ever so briefly, and I found it to be incredibly fulfilling.
Shuaib invited me to join his family for “sahur”, the traditional Islamic breakfast before daybreak during Ramadan. I woke at 3:30, got showered and shaved, and arrived at his house to break bread at 4:30 with his parents, who are of Pakistani origin. Despite having never met them before, they invited me into their home to share in one of their most cherished and personal rituals and were as gracious and welcoming as anyone I’ve met.
Shuaib’s father spoke to me about the meaning of Ramadan, and why the fast was important to their beliefs. He spoke of sacrifice not only of body, but also of mind. He spoke of empathy and understanding. He spoke of his fellow countrymen in Pakistan suffering from a flood worse than the Tsunami in Southeast Asia and the earthquake in Turkey combined. He spoke of compassion for our fellow man, no matter their disposition, in all walks of life, religion, culture and continent- it was a wonderful way to start the day.
During sahur Shuaib’s father said something that really stuck with me. “Fasting helps one to experience how a hungry person feels and what it is like to have an empty stomach. But fasting isn’t just about feeling hungry… it is also about abstaining from pleasures of all the senses and teaches one to share in the sufferings of the less fortunate.”
Muslims believe that fasting leads one to appreciate the bounties beset upon us all, which can so easily be taken for granted until they are gone. I thought it was a great lesson and wondered why everyone didn’t share in such a wonderful tradition. ‘What if everyone who lives in the privileged world took part in this gracious refrain of basic need every once in a while’, I imagined. ‘It would remind us of all that we have- and all those who have not.’
We finished up breakfast at around 5:00, as daybreak comes at 5:10 and there is no food or water permitted “from when the first ribbon of white in the sky to the last”, which meant this was going to be a very long day.
After breakfast I joined Shuaib and his father at the local mosque (across the street from my old middle school) for “fajr” (the first of the 5 daily prayers). I was invited to participate but opted rather to sit in the back and observe, as this was my first time in a mosque during prayer time.
By the time I left the mosque, the sun was coming up and I realized that it was too late for me to brush my teeth without cheating- and since I promised to take part in Sawn, I decided that I had better do it correctly. So, for the first time in my adult life I didn’t brush my teeth after breakfast. I was craving a piece of gum like a dog craves a hydrant, but I was so tired I just decided to go back to bed for an hour instead.
The day wasn’t so bad after all, once I got the idea of food out of my head it really wasn’t all that bad- the no water was actually the worst part. And I was faced with temptation… I found a rogue piece of gum in my pocket a couple hours later that seemed to call out to me, and my father (unexpectedly) invited me to play 9 holes of golf that afternoon. Before we even tee’d off he sat a lush iced tea in the cart cup holder, dripping with sweat and cold relief. “Dad, I can’t have that – remember? I’m fasting? What are you doing to me?” “Well, you better stay hydrated if you’re gonna fast all day…”. I don’t think he got it. Needless to say I didn’t shoot my best round of golf, but I did resist all temptations and that felt better than a hole in one.
That evening, my girlfriend and I joined The Awan’s for “iftar”, the evening meal when Muslims break their fast following “maghrib” (sunset). We began the meal with a date, and followed with “isha”, the last of the five daily prayers. I was again invited to participate in prayers and this time decided to give it a shot. Not because I felt a conversion coming on, rather after this intense day of sawn I felt that I was a part of this community, if only for a day.
Everyone I met was so very gracious and kind, each quite impressed (overly so, perhaps- as they do this every single day for a month, and tomorrow I would be back to ice-cream and mid-day snacks) with my determination to participate in sawn. Shuaib’s father kept insisting that I eat as soon as food was served, offering me juice and dates as soon as they became available. It was something my own father would have done for his guest. And all at once I realized what I suppose I have known all along: everybody in the world is so different and so similar that perhaps it makes perfect sense to be so confused by it all.
How can people of a different religion… or race or culture or color or whatever, be so similar to one another? We all look so distinct, we all dress so differently - but that’s just it. Everything that we initially judge about a person is based on looks, and looks can be deceiving. The shell is just a flavor, like different salads have different dressings. But no matter what the dressing; ceasar, ranch, balsamic, hell the French use butter … at the end of the day is only just that: a dressing. The salad underneath is all the same. What a boring restaurant we would inhabit if there were only one kind of salad dressing in the whole world. What a boring meal. It’d ruin the whole first course! The entire meal would be…. wait… hang on a second… did I just write a full paragraph on salad dressing? Man, I really need a snack – the fast was great and all, but you’ll excuse me if I go grab a Primo’s with a side salad, won’t you. And this time, I think I’ll order something I’ve never had before – after all, difference is what makes life interesting, wouldn’t you say?
Shuaib invited me to join his family for “sahur”, the traditional Islamic breakfast before daybreak during Ramadan. I woke at 3:30, got showered and shaved, and arrived at his house to break bread at 4:30 with his parents, who are of Pakistani origin. Despite having never met them before, they invited me into their home to share in one of their most cherished and personal rituals and were as gracious and welcoming as anyone I’ve met.
Shuaib’s father spoke to me about the meaning of Ramadan, and why the fast was important to their beliefs. He spoke of sacrifice not only of body, but also of mind. He spoke of empathy and understanding. He spoke of his fellow countrymen in Pakistan suffering from a flood worse than the Tsunami in Southeast Asia and the earthquake in Turkey combined. He spoke of compassion for our fellow man, no matter their disposition, in all walks of life, religion, culture and continent- it was a wonderful way to start the day.
During sahur Shuaib’s father said something that really stuck with me. “Fasting helps one to experience how a hungry person feels and what it is like to have an empty stomach. But fasting isn’t just about feeling hungry… it is also about abstaining from pleasures of all the senses and teaches one to share in the sufferings of the less fortunate.”
Muslims believe that fasting leads one to appreciate the bounties beset upon us all, which can so easily be taken for granted until they are gone. I thought it was a great lesson and wondered why everyone didn’t share in such a wonderful tradition. ‘What if everyone who lives in the privileged world took part in this gracious refrain of basic need every once in a while’, I imagined. ‘It would remind us of all that we have- and all those who have not.’
We finished up breakfast at around 5:00, as daybreak comes at 5:10 and there is no food or water permitted “from when the first ribbon of white in the sky to the last”, which meant this was going to be a very long day.
After breakfast I joined Shuaib and his father at the local mosque (across the street from my old middle school) for “fajr” (the first of the 5 daily prayers). I was invited to participate but opted rather to sit in the back and observe, as this was my first time in a mosque during prayer time.
By the time I left the mosque, the sun was coming up and I realized that it was too late for me to brush my teeth without cheating- and since I promised to take part in Sawn, I decided that I had better do it correctly. So, for the first time in my adult life I didn’t brush my teeth after breakfast. I was craving a piece of gum like a dog craves a hydrant, but I was so tired I just decided to go back to bed for an hour instead.
The day wasn’t so bad after all, once I got the idea of food out of my head it really wasn’t all that bad- the no water was actually the worst part. And I was faced with temptation… I found a rogue piece of gum in my pocket a couple hours later that seemed to call out to me, and my father (unexpectedly) invited me to play 9 holes of golf that afternoon. Before we even tee’d off he sat a lush iced tea in the cart cup holder, dripping with sweat and cold relief. “Dad, I can’t have that – remember? I’m fasting? What are you doing to me?” “Well, you better stay hydrated if you’re gonna fast all day…”. I don’t think he got it. Needless to say I didn’t shoot my best round of golf, but I did resist all temptations and that felt better than a hole in one.
That evening, my girlfriend and I joined The Awan’s for “iftar”, the evening meal when Muslims break their fast following “maghrib” (sunset). We began the meal with a date, and followed with “isha”, the last of the five daily prayers. I was again invited to participate in prayers and this time decided to give it a shot. Not because I felt a conversion coming on, rather after this intense day of sawn I felt that I was a part of this community, if only for a day.
Everyone I met was so very gracious and kind, each quite impressed (overly so, perhaps- as they do this every single day for a month, and tomorrow I would be back to ice-cream and mid-day snacks) with my determination to participate in sawn. Shuaib’s father kept insisting that I eat as soon as food was served, offering me juice and dates as soon as they became available. It was something my own father would have done for his guest. And all at once I realized what I suppose I have known all along: everybody in the world is so different and so similar that perhaps it makes perfect sense to be so confused by it all.
How can people of a different religion… or race or culture or color or whatever, be so similar to one another? We all look so distinct, we all dress so differently - but that’s just it. Everything that we initially judge about a person is based on looks, and looks can be deceiving. The shell is just a flavor, like different salads have different dressings. But no matter what the dressing; ceasar, ranch, balsamic, hell the French use butter … at the end of the day is only just that: a dressing. The salad underneath is all the same. What a boring restaurant we would inhabit if there were only one kind of salad dressing in the whole world. What a boring meal. It’d ruin the whole first course! The entire meal would be…. wait… hang on a second… did I just write a full paragraph on salad dressing? Man, I really need a snack – the fast was great and all, but you’ll excuse me if I go grab a Primo’s with a side salad, won’t you. And this time, I think I’ll order something I’ve never had before – after all, difference is what makes life interesting, wouldn’t you say?
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Kicks Challenge #3 – Become Kicks Lesson #1
Okay, so I’m going to alter the way in which I look at these things, and view from a different paradigm. Instead of titling these entries “challenges”, and directing them towards you, the audience, I’ll take them rather as “lessons” and direct them inward. So, as it is to be known henceforth, and forever shall remain the way as if carved in stone by Moses himself, from now on the ‘Kicks Challenges’ will forever be known as ‘Kicks Lessons’ (until I change my mind.)
Friday, September 3, 2010
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
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